ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize