I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
We had sex on a dog bed..
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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