Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
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Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize