JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
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