I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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