i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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