Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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