i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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