How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
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Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
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He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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