Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize