I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
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I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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