guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize