you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
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