sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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