I hope mine doesn't look like that
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
me + whiskey = a bad person
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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