brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
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