He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize