Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize