i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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