do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
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I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
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I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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