Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize