he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize