I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize