im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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