God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
operation have a gay friend backfired
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize