Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
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