direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
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