apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand Curling. That high.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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