this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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