He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
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i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
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Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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