So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
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Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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