I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize