"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize