Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
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