bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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