You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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