i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize