i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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