is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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