It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
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