do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize