dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
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It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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