6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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