I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize