How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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