I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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