I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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