How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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