we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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