at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize